There is an empty and lonely spot within that nothing and no one in this world can fill in. Once you begin to acknowledge and understand this, a true journey within begins. At first, this knowledge throws you off keel completely because now, there's a vacuum that appears to have magnified itself. This feeling of such acute loneliness that touches the very depths of your being and reflects itself in every aspect of your life, keeps resurfacing every now and again, and, most times, rather unexpectedly till you take notice of it and answer its calling. YES, IT IS CALLING YOU and YOU ARE CALLING IT. You will be reminded often till you finally get right into that place and feel it with all your senses. Total acceptance, surrender and forgiveness especially of yourself facilitates this experience. Without it, it is pretty much impossible. Accepting that you cannot handle any of this anymore and acknowledging that it is beyond your power to comprehend with your small mind what the Higher Mind already knows, suddenly propels you into your heart. Your heart knows. It has always known. It will always know that only God Alone can completely fill that gaping hole within. Just God. God Alone.
Take a deep breath and pause. Go for the gold! Know that you will be guided along as you uncover each layer of yourself that you never knew existed. You have to allow yourself to be immersed in this deep pool of inner acute ache till you absolutely get it in the very marrow of your bones the understanding that only God can fill in that void. Nobody or nothing in this world can come even a close second. There will be tears pouring - lots of tears. Be prepared for this onslaught because dams are being broken within and everything is being unleashed. Just stay still. This inner awareness completely changes the course of your life. In my case, this realisation brought all the spiritual activities - reading, study, meditation, contemplation etc. come to life. It began to have meaning and depth. My understanding was becoming clearer and the mists and haze were being lifted up. It seemed like a physical Being of the highest understanding, love and knowledge was sitting in front of me personally teaching me because all those words in front of me were beginning to spring to life. Those very same words that I have read a hundred times or more in the past which had very little impact in the days, months and years before were now coming LIVE to me from Jeshua. It was an inner experience. This new found clarity and surprise of finally understanding what that so oft repeated phrase "we are not alone" really means is what poured over me bringing on so much relief, that it is unexplainable. Perhaps this must be joy. All I know for now is that I pushed open the Door of Awareness a little more today. Its certainly getting brighter within! And what's more? It happened yesterday! And it will happen everyday because it is now true and authentic for me. I will allow the Door of Awareness to be opened wider and wider each day till The Light comes blazing in right into my consciousness. That Light IS always there. You have to step out of the darkness. Its like the sun. You have to step out into the sunlight to sunbathe!!
I Am not lonely. I Am just Alone. (All-One. Unified. United. With God. With Everything). What a relief!
How may I be of service?
~ Lavina ~
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